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The Girl Code: The Most Important Written Laws in History
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Definition (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=girl%20code)
1. girl code
a set of useless, bullshit rules that girls use to govern and bully around their friends, girls or guys.
examples of breaking the girl code:
1. you slept with a guy a friend used to like
2. you ask a guy out that you once saw an aquaintance out with a month before
3. you are friends with someone your friend hates
Girl 1: "what did i do wrong?"
Girl 2: "hello!? you fucking broke the girl code rule #27."
Girl 3: "oh, duh, i checked out a guy that you once that was cute. i am so sorry."
2. Girl Code
The code of guidelines that are girls most obey in order not to get kicked out of the community.
There are many opinions if the Girl Code actually exists, as well as the Guy Code.
1) If you change boyfriends so fast they rarely achieve name status, a man must be around for at least six weeks before you make your friends bother to learn his first name. Until such time, he should be referred to as "The boy" or "That guy".
2) All girls must have a "Mr.Right Now". This is the guy friend who is always ready and available to hang out with you, and may or may not like you as more than a friend. He is always ready to party till dawn, and do things you wish you didn't remember in the morning. He's not ?Mr. Right,? but he may be good enough to be ?Mr. Right Now.?
3) If you just met a guy and know absolutley nothing about him, but need to refer to him during 'girl talk' you use one example of who he is, something he has, or what he does, and he becomes... that guy.
(Ex. "The Camaro guy", "The Trainer dude", "The Four a.m. in the Taxi Guy")
4) Every girl must wait at least a day and a half before calling a guy whose number she has retreived.
5) You are never in any case to date a friends ex or a guy who she was really into.
Exception: If he's one of those guys who every girl likes.
6) You are to never diss a friends boyfriend except to agree lightly or nod when she says he's being a asshole. In most cases it is easier to nod.
Exception: If a guy cheated or dumped your friend is is exceptional for you to claim he isn't good enough, and that she deserves better as well as reminding her that he was an asshole anyway.
7) If you wan't to date a friend brother it is required that you get said friends permission.
8) No girl is to ever hang out with the boyfriend of a friend without the friend present. If permission to is granted their should be at least 3 other people with you.
9) No girl may have more than one 'Love of her Life' at one time, though having a boyfriend and a 'Love of her Life' is fine.
10) No girl shall wear the same outfit or perfume as a friend is they will knowingly be in the same place.
11) No girl shall purchase a distinctive item of clothing which she is aware her friend owns without express permission from the friend.
12) No girl shall borrow an item of clothing without asking the clothing owner's permission, unless both parties have made an official decision to waive this rule in the context of their friendship.
13) An eye for an eye and a foot for a foot. If a friend borrows an item of clothing and destroys it, said friend must re-pay it.
14) The penalty for exposing a secret to an unauthorized party shall be exile from Girlville.
15) A girl who can substantially claim that she was not aware that a piece of information was a secret at the time she exposed it shall not be subject to punishment.
16) Inside jokes are not to be explained to outsiders.
17) Always leave a man wanting more but don't leave him guessing too long since guys do not take hints easily.
18) If a guy your friend is into asks for your number, you are to deny it and walk away, and/or slip him your friends number while saying, "I think she is more your type, you should call her".
19) Chicks before Dicks. Simple.
20) In a case where a friend spreads a horrible rumor about a friend, and than apologizes they are to be given the cold-shoulder for at least 3 days.
21) In a fight between a friend and her boyfriend you must always choose your friends side.
22) When dating a girl should find equal and/or enough time to still hang out with her girls.
23) Never insult your friend but never let your friend leave the house looking hideous. Find a better way to tell your friend how they look.
Ex: 'I think your other jeans are nice', 'You should wear less eyeliner, you have great eyes'.
24) When a friend is drunk, never allow her to dial, drive or leave with a random guy.
25) When a friend calls you up complaining about how she is drunk and can't go home you must allow her to stay at your house, without letting your parentals (if you live with them) find out.
26) When out with the ladies, if Girl #1 points out a guy that she is interested in, Girl #2 should avoid making a bee-line over to him to get his number for herself. Show some respect.
27) When said evening is described as a "Girls? Night Out" that means it is for GIRLS ONLY. Consider it payback for all those tree houses and snow forts we couldn?t enter as children. Do not invite your boyfriend.
28) Stop being the "Me too!" girl If your friend is telling a story, stop stealing her thunder ? and her story ? by constantly trying to one-up her. For example:
GIRL 1: I had a horrible day. My flat iron broke in the middle of straightening, I dropped my brand new bottle of Burberry Touch on the bathroom floor, I missed the bus by two seconds and was late for school, my teacher yelled at me for something Sally did, and I got into a fight with Jason over whose family we?re spending Thanksgiving with.
GIRL 2: Oh that?s horrible. The same thing happened to me today, only I stepped in gum on the subway platform too. And when I went to scrape it off, I tripped and ripped my stockings and it reminded me of the time I was at my ex-boyfriend?s place for Christmas...
29) Be a responsible friend and not a 'Yes-Girl'. If a friend is asking you if she should get back together with her ex who chated on her, never wanted to hang out with her and than blamed her for them breaking up, and you say 'Yes', than you're a bad friend. Friends are supposed to protect and help friends. SO say your part even if they don't like what you have to say.
30) Don't be a hater. If a girl walks in looking gorgeous, girls automatically try to find something bad about her. But who knows? She could have just lose a friend, or got dumped, etc. So be nice and stop hating.
31) Don't go against the Girl Code
Speaking in Code
When Women Break Girl Code
What girl HASN'T heard of this code? It's an unwritten - but often spoken of - code of ethics that every girl is bound by. Some of the rules are really dumb...here's an example: Your best friend is not on speaking terms with someone she were once very close to. A huge blow out recently ended their friendship. You, being her best friend and only the acquaintance of the second party, are also somehow obliged to no longer speak to this second party as well. As if by default, YOU are also not on speaking terms with the jerk who did nothing to you. It's dumb, but we do it to protect the feelings of the people we care about.
Some of the rules are really useful. For example, you and your friends go out to a party. They give you your space when a cute guy comes up to dance with you. When they spot a creeper coming up behind you or see you being trapped in a corner by a disgusting, piss-drunk guy who doesn't understand that his pick up lines are not working... they get you out of the situation ASAP. It can be something as simple as a hand gesture or something as blatant as grabbing your arm and yanking you onto the dance floor. Girl Code. And of course, if there are only two of you, you are NOT to ditch the other girl for a guy on your girls' night...unless she agrees that this guy is a mega catch, and insists that you do. Girl Code.
Other important code points to keep in mind...
* Even if you really like the new dress your friend bought at Macy's last week, you will NOT go buy the same one a few days later
* On a double date gone wrong, you accompany each other to the bathroom so you can plan your escape
* You never, under any circumstances, get involved with someone your friend had previously dated/hooked up with/gotten involved with in any way.
* If your friend calls you at four in the morning crying and heartbroken, you get your ass out of bed, put on your slippers, and go comfort her. And you hate the asshole that did it to her, of course.
Now here's where the girl code gets fuzzy for me. The line. Where do you draw the line between loyalty and just plain stupid? More importantly, WHO are you supposed to be loyal to? The code is meant to apply to all females, period. The whole point is that we women get screwed enough by the opposite gender. The last thing we need is to watch our back from other bitches too. So we make this code and secretly hope that everyone follows it, knowing damn well that they won't. But there are still people we expect to. Like our friends. But where does it end? Best friends? Party friends? Acquaintances? Girls you know of, but don't talk to?
I'm the last person to understand girl code. I think I've broken it a couple of times because I didn't understand its parameters. Example: I once hurt a girl who has always hated me. I didn't feel an obligation to her at the time, because she had never liked me, and probably never would have no matter what I did. I didn't see the wrong in it. After a few years had passed I started to get it. It doesn't matter if she didn't like me. It's still girl code. It's about compassion for the people like you. People who you have more in common with than you think. People who never want to be hurt, just like you.
Here's why I ask. I grew up with a girl. From the age of seven, we were attached at the hip. I lived at her house half the time, and she lived at mine the other half - we were practically sisters. We were the best of friends for a long time, and only started drifting apart halfway through high school. That's a solid ten years of inseparability.
Even after we drifted apart, when we ran into each other, we still had a place for one another in our hearts. I still felt I could say or do anything with her. I still kept in touch with her casually through my first year of college, and I am still greeted by bear hugs and kisses from her family. I was their unofficially adopted daughter...what do you expect?
I haven't seen or talked to her in about a year. People go their separate ways; it happens. I'm indifferent. But I still consider her one of the most important people in my life. The memories, the time, the experiences, the lessons learned...it is all so valuable. And I still feel like if she called me up tomorrow and asked me to do something for her, I would do it.
That being said, I just found out that she's dating my ex boyfriend - the guy I dated for two and a half years, while she and I were still good friends. (Note: This is just a rumor for now, but it stemmed from my ex's parents, so I feel there's some truth to it.) Now don't get me wrong. We've been broken up for a while, and I don't care if he sees other girls. I am happy with the most amazing guy I've ever met, who I've been with for close to three years now. And when I have heard of Ex's women in the past, it hasn't bothered me.
But I have to say, when I heard this, I was truly shocked. At first I just thought it was really odd, and it made me laugh. But when I got to thinking about it...I felt a little bit hurt that someone I felt so close to, despite our lack of contact recently, would consider it okay to date someone who once broke my heart.
That's what I need someone to tell me. Is she violating girl code? Or does it not apply to her because I have not spoken to her in over a year?
1. girl code
a set of useless, bullshit rules that girls use to govern and bully around their friends, girls or guys.
examples of breaking the girl code:
1. you slept with a guy a friend used to like
2. you ask a guy out that you once saw an aquaintance out with a month before
3. you are friends with someone your friend hates
Girl 1: "what did i do wrong?"
Girl 2: "hello!? you fucking broke the girl code rule #27."
Girl 3: "oh, duh, i checked out a guy that you once that was cute. i am so sorry."
2. Girl Code
The code of guidelines that are girls most obey in order not to get kicked out of the community.
There are many opinions if the Girl Code actually exists, as well as the Guy Code.
1) If you change boyfriends so fast they rarely achieve name status, a man must be around for at least six weeks before you make your friends bother to learn his first name. Until such time, he should be referred to as "The boy" or "That guy".
2) All girls must have a "Mr.Right Now". This is the guy friend who is always ready and available to hang out with you, and may or may not like you as more than a friend. He is always ready to party till dawn, and do things you wish you didn't remember in the morning. He's not ?Mr. Right,? but he may be good enough to be ?Mr. Right Now.?
3) If you just met a guy and know absolutley nothing about him, but need to refer to him during 'girl talk' you use one example of who he is, something he has, or what he does, and he becomes... that guy.
(Ex. "The Camaro guy", "The Trainer dude", "The Four a.m. in the Taxi Guy")
4) Every girl must wait at least a day and a half before calling a guy whose number she has retreived.
5) You are never in any case to date a friends ex or a guy who she was really into.
Exception: If he's one of those guys who every girl likes.
6) You are to never diss a friends boyfriend except to agree lightly or nod when she says he's being a asshole. In most cases it is easier to nod.
Exception: If a guy cheated or dumped your friend is is exceptional for you to claim he isn't good enough, and that she deserves better as well as reminding her that he was an asshole anyway.
7) If you wan't to date a friend brother it is required that you get said friends permission.
8) No girl is to ever hang out with the boyfriend of a friend without the friend present. If permission to is granted their should be at least 3 other people with you.
9) No girl may have more than one 'Love of her Life' at one time, though having a boyfriend and a 'Love of her Life' is fine.
10) No girl shall wear the same outfit or perfume as a friend is they will knowingly be in the same place.
11) No girl shall purchase a distinctive item of clothing which she is aware her friend owns without express permission from the friend.
12) No girl shall borrow an item of clothing without asking the clothing owner's permission, unless both parties have made an official decision to waive this rule in the context of their friendship.
13) An eye for an eye and a foot for a foot. If a friend borrows an item of clothing and destroys it, said friend must re-pay it.
14) The penalty for exposing a secret to an unauthorized party shall be exile from Girlville.
15) A girl who can substantially claim that she was not aware that a piece of information was a secret at the time she exposed it shall not be subject to punishment.
16) Inside jokes are not to be explained to outsiders.
17) Always leave a man wanting more but don't leave him guessing too long since guys do not take hints easily.
18) If a guy your friend is into asks for your number, you are to deny it and walk away, and/or slip him your friends number while saying, "I think she is more your type, you should call her".
19) Chicks before Dicks. Simple.
20) In a case where a friend spreads a horrible rumor about a friend, and than apologizes they are to be given the cold-shoulder for at least 3 days.
21) In a fight between a friend and her boyfriend you must always choose your friends side.
22) When dating a girl should find equal and/or enough time to still hang out with her girls.
23) Never insult your friend but never let your friend leave the house looking hideous. Find a better way to tell your friend how they look.
Ex: 'I think your other jeans are nice', 'You should wear less eyeliner, you have great eyes'.
24) When a friend is drunk, never allow her to dial, drive or leave with a random guy.
25) When a friend calls you up complaining about how she is drunk and can't go home you must allow her to stay at your house, without letting your parentals (if you live with them) find out.
26) When out with the ladies, if Girl #1 points out a guy that she is interested in, Girl #2 should avoid making a bee-line over to him to get his number for herself. Show some respect.
27) When said evening is described as a "Girls? Night Out" that means it is for GIRLS ONLY. Consider it payback for all those tree houses and snow forts we couldn?t enter as children. Do not invite your boyfriend.
28) Stop being the "Me too!" girl If your friend is telling a story, stop stealing her thunder ? and her story ? by constantly trying to one-up her. For example:
GIRL 1: I had a horrible day. My flat iron broke in the middle of straightening, I dropped my brand new bottle of Burberry Touch on the bathroom floor, I missed the bus by two seconds and was late for school, my teacher yelled at me for something Sally did, and I got into a fight with Jason over whose family we?re spending Thanksgiving with.
GIRL 2: Oh that?s horrible. The same thing happened to me today, only I stepped in gum on the subway platform too. And when I went to scrape it off, I tripped and ripped my stockings and it reminded me of the time I was at my ex-boyfriend?s place for Christmas...
29) Be a responsible friend and not a 'Yes-Girl'. If a friend is asking you if she should get back together with her ex who chated on her, never wanted to hang out with her and than blamed her for them breaking up, and you say 'Yes', than you're a bad friend. Friends are supposed to protect and help friends. SO say your part even if they don't like what you have to say.
30) Don't be a hater. If a girl walks in looking gorgeous, girls automatically try to find something bad about her. But who knows? She could have just lose a friend, or got dumped, etc. So be nice and stop hating.
31) Don't go against the Girl Code
Speaking in Code
(an excerpt from The Girl Code: The Secret Language of Single Women (On
Dating, Sex, Shopping, and Honor Among Girlfriends) by Diane Farr
http://www.enotalone.com/article/3994.html)
1
Speaking in Code
You know those little disclaimers on the sides of cigarettes and
alcohol? Well, if your next date came with a warning label, it would
contain the following information down the side of his leg. This is the
common language of girlfriends who've been there.
Titles
?We don't see
things as they are,
we see them as we are.? - Ana?s Nin
THE BOY
If you change suitors so fast that they rarely achieve name status, a
man must be around for at least six weeks before you make your friends
bother to learn his first name. Until such time, he should be referred
to by this generic title.
For Women Who:
Need to explain to numerous people what's going on in their love life,
Are between the ages of sixteen and twenty-one or over twenty-seven,
Have overbearing mothers and aunts in their life, Have called off more than one engagement.
As a Modifier: ?It's been two months now; I think the boy has reached
name status: His name is Dick, and I'm pretty sure he isn't one.?
MR. RIGHT NOW
This is the guy friend of yours who doesn't have a real job, and is
always ready and available when you want to party till dawn, and do
things you wish you didn't remember in the morning. He's not ?Mr.
Right,? but he may be good enough to be ?Mr. Right Now.?
When to Retire Him:
Immediately after college,
When you're not so afraid of a real man,
When he asks you for cab fare home,
After a particularly lonely holiday season.
As an Excuse: ?It's not that I'm afraid of a committed relationship; at
the moment all I need is to find a new keg and to pull Mr. Right Now
out from underneath the empty one.?
THE [fill in the blank] GUY
When you've just met a man and know little to nothing about him but you
need to identify him during girl talk, so you use one example of who he
is, something he has, or what he does, and he becomes... that guy.
Best Types of References:
The kind of car he drives (The Camaro Guy),
His occupation (The Personal Trainer Guy),
Where you met him (The Four a.m. in the Taxi Guy),
The way in which he behaved in the morning if you've already woken up with him (The Cuddle Guy,
The Bad Breath Guy, The Up and Run Guy, etc.).
As an Object: ?He's the guy that slipped the ma?tre d' twenty dollars
for the table, spoke to the waitress like a human, and never had to use
his napkin through all of dinner-you know, the Good Manners Guy.?
THE TAKE-HOME PROJECT
When you feel like ignoring some larger issues in your own life, so you
invest in a fixer-upper guy-who will cost you nothing but time, money,
energy, and happiness. Inevitably, you learn that someone else has
recouped his resale value.
Hello! You Will Never:
Fix him to your liking,
Change anything but the window dressing,
Turn him into the guy who got away,
Build the bionic man (...Farrah tried and she couldn't do it, even with all that hair).
As a Reminder: ?Forget him, he can't even dress himself and you don't have the patience for a take-home project.?
A BENEFACTOR
This is a polite title for that 35-45-year-old man who dates
19-25-year-old women. Having one always seems so original (and
economical) at first, because he takes you to many more exciting places
than guys your own age do and, of course, he pays for everything. (But
don't think you invented this: In the old days they just called him a
Sugar Daddy.)
Things to Look Out for:
A wife,
Some kids,
The fact that you're a grown man's Barbie doll,
That anyone who can hang out with someone who's fifteen years younger than him is a loser.
As a Reprimand: ?No, he's not my father... he's my benefactor; and who cares if he's bald, he pays!?
P.D.A. BOY
The guy you go out in public with and agree to hold hands with, kiss,
hug, sit on the same side of the booth with, or show any other Public
Display of Affection, before determining boyfriend status.
Usually Causing:
Your friends to abuse you,
Your feelings for him to escalate unrealistically,
One person to suspect the other likes him or her too much too soon,
An inappropriate use of the boyfriend title or ?I love you? phrase.
As an Error: ?So there's me and P.D.A. boy making out in the pizza place, and in walks my boss: Kill me now.?
A WELCOME MAT
This is what your friends call you when you keep taking back the guy
who only comes a-knockin' on your door for one thing: sex, drugs, or
rock 'n' roll. (We could have just called you a doormat, but you're
always so damn friendly when he shows up.)
When Did You Decide:
To act like AstroTurf?
That he's so much better than you are?
That you didn't need therapy anymore?
That the girl who tortured you in grammar school was right?
As a Wake-Up Call: ?Yeah, I'm sure he meant to call you, because
everyone wants to check in on a welcome mat after they tread on it.?
LUGGAGE
After you or your man has told the other to get lost and you keep
finding each other at events of mutual interest. If you tossed him,
he's the luggage, and what's required is a game of ditch. If he tossed
you, then you're the luggage, and this is a game of looking as though
you're having a good time without him.
Necessary Requirements: At least one ally to help you ditch or save face,
A mineral water because alcohol will kill you here,
A good seat for viewing or hiding,
A ladies' room to escape to if the game gets too intense.
As a Plea to God: ?I must have 'Samsonite Customer Service' stamped
right on my forehead, because I cannot lose this luggage for the life
of me.?
When Women Break Girl CodeWhat girl HASN'T heard of this code? It's an unwritten - but often spoken of - code of ethics that every girl is bound by. Some of the rules are really dumb...here's an example: Your best friend is not on speaking terms with someone she were once very close to. A huge blow out recently ended their friendship. You, being her best friend and only the acquaintance of the second party, are also somehow obliged to no longer speak to this second party as well. As if by default, YOU are also not on speaking terms with the jerk who did nothing to you. It's dumb, but we do it to protect the feelings of the people we care about.
Some of the rules are really useful. For example, you and your friends go out to a party. They give you your space when a cute guy comes up to dance with you. When they spot a creeper coming up behind you or see you being trapped in a corner by a disgusting, piss-drunk guy who doesn't understand that his pick up lines are not working... they get you out of the situation ASAP. It can be something as simple as a hand gesture or something as blatant as grabbing your arm and yanking you onto the dance floor. Girl Code. And of course, if there are only two of you, you are NOT to ditch the other girl for a guy on your girls' night...unless she agrees that this guy is a mega catch, and insists that you do. Girl Code.
Other important code points to keep in mind...
* Even if you really like the new dress your friend bought at Macy's last week, you will NOT go buy the same one a few days later
* On a double date gone wrong, you accompany each other to the bathroom so you can plan your escape
* You never, under any circumstances, get involved with someone your friend had previously dated/hooked up with/gotten involved with in any way.
* If your friend calls you at four in the morning crying and heartbroken, you get your ass out of bed, put on your slippers, and go comfort her. And you hate the asshole that did it to her, of course.
Now here's where the girl code gets fuzzy for me. The line. Where do you draw the line between loyalty and just plain stupid? More importantly, WHO are you supposed to be loyal to? The code is meant to apply to all females, period. The whole point is that we women get screwed enough by the opposite gender. The last thing we need is to watch our back from other bitches too. So we make this code and secretly hope that everyone follows it, knowing damn well that they won't. But there are still people we expect to. Like our friends. But where does it end? Best friends? Party friends? Acquaintances? Girls you know of, but don't talk to?
I'm the last person to understand girl code. I think I've broken it a couple of times because I didn't understand its parameters. Example: I once hurt a girl who has always hated me. I didn't feel an obligation to her at the time, because she had never liked me, and probably never would have no matter what I did. I didn't see the wrong in it. After a few years had passed I started to get it. It doesn't matter if she didn't like me. It's still girl code. It's about compassion for the people like you. People who you have more in common with than you think. People who never want to be hurt, just like you.
Here's why I ask. I grew up with a girl. From the age of seven, we were attached at the hip. I lived at her house half the time, and she lived at mine the other half - we were practically sisters. We were the best of friends for a long time, and only started drifting apart halfway through high school. That's a solid ten years of inseparability.
Even after we drifted apart, when we ran into each other, we still had a place for one another in our hearts. I still felt I could say or do anything with her. I still kept in touch with her casually through my first year of college, and I am still greeted by bear hugs and kisses from her family. I was their unofficially adopted daughter...what do you expect?
I haven't seen or talked to her in about a year. People go their separate ways; it happens. I'm indifferent. But I still consider her one of the most important people in my life. The memories, the time, the experiences, the lessons learned...it is all so valuable. And I still feel like if she called me up tomorrow and asked me to do something for her, I would do it.
That being said, I just found out that she's dating my ex boyfriend - the guy I dated for two and a half years, while she and I were still good friends. (Note: This is just a rumor for now, but it stemmed from my ex's parents, so I feel there's some truth to it.) Now don't get me wrong. We've been broken up for a while, and I don't care if he sees other girls. I am happy with the most amazing guy I've ever met, who I've been with for close to three years now. And when I have heard of Ex's women in the past, it hasn't bothered me.
But I have to say, when I heard this, I was truly shocked. At first I just thought it was really odd, and it made me laugh. But when I got to thinking about it...I felt a little bit hurt that someone I felt so close to, despite our lack of contact recently, would consider it okay to date someone who once broke my heart.
That's what I need someone to tell me. Is she violating girl code? Or does it not apply to her because I have not spoken to her in over a year?
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